We all have been talked about at one time or another right! At some time in our lives someone has had something to say about us whether it was good or bad. I believe as well that those comments either made us or broke us. Compliments or criticism can affect how you move through life but only with your permission.
Hiding Behind My Glasses.....
When people talk about me I take it personal and it can affect my mood and response even if it's positive feedback. I wanted to tackle this subject because when people have something to say about me, I am so concerned with it that it changes the way I look at myself. It causes me to take personal inventory. I get upset because I don't want others to see me in a negative light. Being this way creates a barrier to authenticity. If I am truly growing in this realm of authenticity then I'd have to admit that when I pay attention to what others say about me, good or bad, I measure myself against it. It's sad. Many people will not look within themselves and admit that. Yet, I know that its true for many others.
I remember growing up and wanting an A+ all of the time. I was a smart kid. I never thought of myself as dumb. I never have. I received great grades in school. When I was in middle school I moved and that moved took me out of my comfort zone. I was introduced to a different culture. I was in the city now instead of the country. I wasn't used to the fast paced life. When i started my new school I was stared at, I was asked several questions, and I remember being looked at from head to toe. I remember being talked about and laughed at. I was laughed at so much by a particular guy that I only sat at the front of the bus to protect myself from additional humiliation. During this time I went from being at the top of my class with several awards to being the below average ugly girl with nappy hair. I begin to fail. I refused to go to school because I was afraid of what would be said about me. More than that I was afraid that I was that girl. So what did I do? I avoided it as much as possible. I hid who i was. I also his from the mean words directed toward me. I tucked my head in like a turtle. I didn't want to face the world. Becoming the turtle only understood to hide inside my hard shell until danger passed. Like the title i moved slowly and cautiously through life. I hid who I was because who I was continued to constantly be under attack.
Much to my pleasure, I was able to go back to my former school the next year. However, I'd already been bruised. I'd already had the weight of what the bully's insecurities and fear attached to my psyche. I carried it around like it was something I was born with and couldn't get rid of. It had note become apart of me. I begin to act as if I was the sum of what the bully added me up to be. To have someone talk so negatively about me without even knowing me caused me to sink instead of swim. Due to having gained such a negative image of myself I hid my talents. I refused to show others that I was smart. Even up until my 30's I would not show my college mates that I was smart. I remained quiet.
I can remember having a test in one of my college courses. Everyone was struggling on it. I finished first! The professor decided to grade the test while everyone was still in class. I was the only one to ace it. He then stepped out of the room. The other classmates were like WHAT??? Why didn't you tell us you understood this stuff. I felt like a fraud. I felt like I'd done them a disservice. I didn't have to share anything with them but at the core I did want to get more involved with them. I didn't mind helping my peers with understanding the subject matter because I'm the kind of person who wants us all to get ahead. What I'm getting at is, had I not allowed the words of others to get into my head and stay there I could have been who I was without fear.
Authentic's it makes a difference how we perceive others actions toward us. I heard my life coach say recently that it doesn't matter to her whether people say good things or bad things about her because she knows who she is. If people say good things, it adds nothing and if people say bad things it doesn't add or take anything away. That's the perception and concept I'm practicing going forward in my life. This concept allows you to be you in the fullness of God's creativity. It allows you to be your God-breathed self without apology. When you are simply being you and you're sure of YOU then what people say about you has no bearing. It carries no weight. It doesn't stick. It won't break your spirit. It can't because the fortress you built is undeniably the best fortress you could have ever made for yourself. It's the strongest in the world. Surrounded by the best of the best. Armor and Angels!
God's top flight security!
My goal is to live authentically everyday without apologizing for who I am. How do you survive each day being you? We don't worry about what others have to say. We don't concern ourselves with their ill words. We are appreciative of their kind ones but we'll be who we are before and after their kind words are said. We will always be. It's who God made us. No man can change that. It's a done deal. So be sure of yourself. Let the person who's doing all the talking stay in their lane and you continue to advance in yours!
Until next time my loves....
#JourneytoAuthenticity
#HidingBehindMyGlasses
#GettingNaked
#BeYou
#YouInspireMe
#AuthenticLiving
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